In the future, hard-ons will lead us through the sky

Yes past-dwelling humanoids, this is the future of transportation. Here in the future, those in the upper and middle classes all own aerial motor cars. The most popular model, as pictured above, is manufactured by General Fiat-Chrysleryundai Motors, who primarily employs Mexican labourbots. The top of the line Erector model is pictured as it transports two dainty ladies about town—3000 feet in the air! The Erector comes equipped with Phallic Guidance Technology. A humanoid must simply enter the co-ordinates of a destination into the PGT mainframe by means including but not limited to: colouring in the specific bubbles using a #2 pencil on a hole-punched 2" x 6" piece of cardstock, insert said piece of cardstock into the cardstock collection conveyor belt, flip the PGT technology switch (it is tantamount that you utilize the PGT technology switch holster, otherwise the switch will flail uncontrollably from the on to off position repeatedly, leading to the eventual implosion of the entire PGT mainframe), feeding the PGT mainframe precisely 4 slices of moist smoked smeat through its FeedSpout™ (the better quality meat used, the better the mileage of your aerial motor car). Although much debate has come about in recent future years as to the sustainability of aerial motor cars and General Fiat-Chrysleryundai Motors has begun to develop a hybrid version whose PGT mainframe can be fed soy-based meat substitute products, one cannot deny that it is the most luxurious and efficient manner of travel.

In the future, bathrooms shall be sponsored by Sony Playstation

Behold the bathroom of the future, sponsored by Sony Playstation. Yes, here in the future, bathrooms make poor use of space, but no matter you congested scoundrels of the past, we have an abundance of space due to generations of sterilization by means of Blackberry ownership. Unlike the majority of bathrooms in the futile past, the bathroom of the future comes equipped with a laptop computer ledge on which to rest your laptop computer. In archaic bathrooms the space for this ledge was occupied by a urine and excrement depository water-flow bowl, but no longer! These urine and excrement depositories have been outlawed by the Intergalactic Senate after far too many HTC Blackberry-style cellular modular devices were found clogged within the interconnected sewage subsystem, causing mass backups. This then forced humanoids to release excess urine and excrement from window cills. This in turn caused a massive boom for the umbrella industry and soon an umbrella-based economy was the cornerstone of all successful nations. Gradually, umbrella companies throughout the galaxy began to amalgamate until eventually one all-powerful umbrella company remained, Umbrellco, which was so powerful that it rivaled the Intergalactic Senate itself. Soon a war was waged between Umbrellco's standing army and the Intergalactic Senate's sexy killbots (with laser beam nipples! beeeooommm!) until a truce was reached based on conditions including but not limited to: Umbrellco being the exclusive umbrella supplier to humanity, Umbrellco becoming a recognized political party in the Intergalactic Senate, a new galactic statutory holiday honoring those humanoid lives lost in the attempted Blackberry coup several years prior.

The bathroom of the future also features not one but TWO flat screen monitors and a roll of toilet paper beside the laptop computer ledge in case your laptop computer leaks excess RAM.